How to Deal with Disappointment and Obtain Peace Again

My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9 

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 

“Peace of mind comes from not wanting to change others but to embrace life changes that are taking place.”   Gerald G. Jampolsky

Disappointment (noun): the feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the defeat of one’s hopes or expectations 

Examples of disappointments: Have you experienced these?  Why did I lose my job?  What is the reason that I don’t have a close relationship with my children? Why did I have to experience heartbreak and loss of a relationship? Why do I have to deal with this illness now in my life? Etc., etc.

Our disappointments are different, yours and mine, but we all have them. Yours are as real and crushing and painful to you as mine are to me, and they linger, needling our hearts, despite our best intentions to leave them behind. 

When disappointments happen in life, what are ways we could move past them? I know I wish I could instantly make them disappear from my heart and mind. “Poof” and they are gone in a nanosecond. :) 

However, I believe that God that allows disappointments in our life to grow from. Why do disappointments happen? Maybe we chose a different way than God wanted us to go. Maybe He wanted us to grow and learn from a disappointment to recognize when we obtain rewards and happiness later in life. Maybe He allowed things to happen so we could be molded into a stronger person and Christian “depending on Him for peace” (Philippians 4:6-7)

 

Focus on the learning that can come from any situation in your life. Yes, you can learn and find strength from anything that happens to you. Extremely difficult at time? Most definitely! I certainly learned from and found strength as a result of my own experiences with cancer and divorce. If you see ALL situations in life as a way of learning and growing, it helps you let go of your need for things to be a certain way. 

War…………a way of learning

 

Heartbreak..a way of learning

 

Peace……….a way of learning

 

Illness……….a way of learning

 

Poverty……..a way of learning

 

Depression…..a way of learning

 

Joy………….a way of learning 

So despite what is happening in your life and in the world, constantly remind yourself “I can learn from this.” When you can see the opportunities inherent in all situations, good or bad, it truly helps you embrace all the uncertainty in your life. 

Embrace the thought “It’s all happening according to God’s Plan.” 

This is another affirmation I use over and over. And it truly helps me let go of my needing things to be a certain way. “Shelley, how can things be happening through God when there is possibility of  heartbreak, war,  illness, poverty, and violence?” My answer to that is that we cannot know the “God’s Plan,” the great mystery of it all, and as we say “It’s all happening because of His Will for my life,” we begin looking for the good in any situation that life hands us. When we look for the good, we always find it. Yes, so much good can come from so much that is bad. In that, it truly is happening perfectly according to His Plan.  

Focus on the blessings. I have learned from my heroes that, no matter how horrible life may seem on the outside, it is so important to focus on the beauty. As we go about our daily lives, we take so many wonderful things for granted. It’s now time to notice. Strangely, this is hard to do, especially when we have our eyes focused on the bad. It sounds ridiculous, but we actually have to train ourselves to notice all the beauty in our lives. And train ourselves, we must…because focusing on the blessings is an absolute necessity for diffusing our fears about the future.

How do we do this?: As you go about your day, stop for a moment and notice when something wonderful happens. Then say to yourself while still in the glory of the moment, “I have had this.” This is the acknowledgment that “No matter what happens tomorrow, I have had this today.” It is in the noticing of the little things that you truly get the feeling of a life well-lived … that wonderful hot shower, that kiss from a loved one, the fact that your car started, that great dinner you are eating, the warm rays of the sun, a candy bar, a wonderful television show …. 

 

FATHER GOD – THANK YOU FOR THE REWARDS AND PEACE WE OBTAIN FROM YOU GOING THROUGH DIFFICULT TIMES. REMIND US WHEN WE ARE GOING THROUGH DIFFICULTIES THAT IT IS ACCORDING TO YOUR PLAN. IT IS TO STRENGTHEN US AND MOLD US TO BE STRONGER THROUGH YOU. HELP US TO FOCUS ON THE BLESSINGS THAT YOU PROVIDE TO US ON A DAILY BASIS. HELP US TO REMEMBER  THAT YOU HAVE GOOD AND HOPEFUL PLANS FOR OUR FUTURE. HELP US TO LEARN FROM OUR DISAPPOINTMENTS. AMEN.

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